BIIIIIIG Update On the Funny Farm

Anyone who has read the blog a while knows we have two biological teens who are almost 15 and 17.  They are precious, wise, beautiful and love God.  Can I ask for more?

After my husband losing his job in 2005, filing bankruptcy, relocating across the country SOLELY on a word from God in our hearts to move to DFW, we felt like our hope to adopt as son would never happen.  On May 18, 2006 I literally looked at my Bible in contempt and said to God, "Lord you promised me a son but we just filed bankruptcy.  We lost everything. We are rebuilding, but who will ever let us adopt?  Its not possible, and I accept it."  I felt an urgency to pick up my Bible and opened to the passage that said, "In one year you will hold a son in your arms."

A year later on May 28, 2007, I held Baby J in my arms.  He was our first foster son, 5 1/2 pounds old at six weeks.  Tiny drug exposed and adorable.  For almost a year, we were told he was going to be adoptable.  But at the Midnight hour, the parents totally pulled it together and got him back.  And you know what? We accepted it.  We were CONFUSED by a promise that didn't get fulfilled, but we accepted it and were proud for his parents. I didn't expect them to win any parenting awards, but I did think they would function. Dont get me wrong...we were D E V A S T A T E D but accepted it with Joy.

A couple of weeks after Baby J came, Baby R came at 1 day old. Also drug exposed, but he had family trying to get him.  Right from the start we knew he was going to be a foster placement, and we are sad but pleased when he went to live with his grandparents at 5 months old.

Then we had The Stuntman.  He has DiGeorge Syndrome, 14 q deletion (rare and nothing is known about it), immudeficient, needed open heart surgery, etc.  He had family who wanted him on his Dad's side, and we enjoyed taking care of this sickly little guy.  On the very day he had open heart surgery, we were told he was adoptable.  His family had been denied.  We said Yes.  Of course the Cherokee Nation wanted to take him since we were not Cherokee.  I was scrambling to prove my Choctaw heritage thinking it might help, when come to find out, when the Nation learned of the extent of his medical problems, they said, "God bless you.  He's yours."  So we adopted The Stuntman in May 2009.

The Diva came in 2008 when she was 5 months old as an adoptive placement. Her mom was a crack addict prostitute and didnt' want her, and her dad was barely surviving in a nursing home with AIDS.  She had a few medical and developmental problems and qualified for subsidy, and was adopted in August 2009.

We had 3 other kiddos who came and went to relatives or other families.  And it hurt.  Much as you want them to be where they should be, it hurts.  And we decided the toll on our teens was too much.  We relinquished our license.

Couple months later, Baby R's grandparents asked us to consider taking him back and adopting him.  BOY WERE WE SHOCKED!!!!  He came back in early 2010 and we adopted him privately.  And it was hard.  He was only 3 but highly intelligent and KNEW he was given up for adoption after being attached to his grandparents. They did it in pure love and sacrifice FOR HIM, but it has plagued him with anxiety and RAD type issues for the past 2 years.  He is doing very well now, and He is The Professor!

While we were in the difficult times of assimilating The Professor, we got the most amazing AND STRANGE phone call ever.  Baby J was now 3 1/2 and back in foster care, and did we want him back. I WAS SHOCKED!  Well, we weren't licensed.  And much as we wanted to run out and get licensed, we couldn't jeopardize Baby J's wellbeing or the Professors as he worked through the worst of his attachment issues.  He was violent.  It was hard.  So we waited a year until Baby J's parent's rights were termiminated, and took him back into our home.  From day one, he was ours and we were his.  And tho he is an older boy, in many ways he was in the same developmental state as when he had left 2 years earlier.  He has zero attachment issues, but he is diagnosed as autistic.  He was severely neglected and having been in a great foster home for a year and now with us for almost a year, he is doing very well.  He has global delays and the public school is concerned there is mental retardation.  We have some concerns as well.  He has a lot of difficulty learning and at 5 years old, just now knows 4 colors.  But he is precious.  I need to think of a blog name!  We officially adopted him this past February 2012.

So that makes 6 kids.  Two teenagers and four drug exposed, adopted children with special needs (developmental or emotional) who were all born within one year.  Right now they are 5, 5, 4 1/2 and 4 1/2.  And every day is FULL FULL FULL and really just totally amazing.

We said we would NEVER do it, but we just moved to Houston. WHA?  We loved DFW but out of nowhere, we just felt God wanted us to take his company up on an old offer to transfer to the Houston office that we had previously turned down. They paid for our closing costs on the sale of our home and our move, and here we are!  We've been here two months.  And the area we live in is awesome.  Strangely, even though I have always hated it here, now I really find I like it.  And I believe with all my heart great things are to come!!!!!!!  We have seen great changes already in our 4 little ones just from new services and little things like the layout of the house where they have more freedom to move around independently.

So I've been thinking what a good place we are in!  I've been asking God, "What next?"  Why do I feel like we were brought here ON PURPOSE?  Will I go back into church ministry work?  Will my daughters find husbands here?  I've just been enjoying that we are assimilating and things are not quite as hard as they have been since we became foster parents.  We are a family. I don't have that made desire for a baby anymore.  I am content. I am blessed, and I know it. How can I ask for more than my husband and my six beautiful kids?

Well, two months ago My Princess (16 1/2) started telling me she wanted a baby.  She has been crazy over wanting a baby...for me, not for her.  I have told her our adoption days are full. We can't afford private adoption and we are "full" as far as foster care homes go.  The Stuntman's mommy and The Diva's mommy, who have the babies all the time, are both in prison.  There is no potential for babies.  And we have NO baby stuff. I wept a year ago and gave it all away.  This foster care ministry is over for now until the kids are much older.  We are just focusing on being a forever family.

And then The Diva, who is black, started praying for a black baby sister or brother. She even has an imaginary twin sister with a name similar to hers.  Every day she tells me multiple times she wants us to have a brown baby like her.  I've told her we can't have babies anymore, but we can ask God to bless her with a family with brown skin like hers who will have a baby she can play with, and a grandma who will be special for her (since her birth family has no contact with her).

Its been a big family joke about the brown baby we aren't going to have but The Diva is obsessed with going on 2 months now.

So naturally, I was in UTTER SHOCK yesterday when we found out The Diva's mommy is NOT in prison and just had a baby 2 months ago. Two Months.  Weird?  Yes.  Did My Sunshine and The Diva have foresight into God's plan? I don't know.  They said they tried to get ahold of us 2 months ago, but now they realize they never actually tried and forgot.  OOPS.  He is with a couple 5 hours away from us.  There is all the stuff going on with finding the baby daddy and DNA tests and permanency hearings and all that.  But the feedback from the state is that if the dude that stepped IS the baby daddy, he will not get the baby.  And they want us to adopt.

So SURPRISE!  I'm still in shock.  I'm 100% thinking this is God.  The state is 100% wanting us to adopt, pending the family not having anyone who qualifies.  In the case we are not interested, the foster family will adopt him, but they have already been told they want him with us.

So my hubby, the rational one, the one who reasons, the one who supports ten people already (me, him, 6 kids and his parents who live with us and help us so much) is keeping an open mind and praying about it.  He said, I don't even have to ask what you want to do.  I snicker.

yes I know we will continue to get these calls. And yes I know we can't say yes 15 more times.  But it has always been something in the back of our minds that The Diva needs a sibling who shares her ethnicity. With her praying the way she has, and My Sunshine's foreshadowing, I think this is a God thing.

Pray if you will, that we will have Divine Direction and know without doubt what to do.  My father in law always says, "Why would that be something to pray over?" His feeling is we are able to adopt another, we have the space, we have all the love in the world, and God commands us to take care of the orphans.  So what is there to pray over?  Well, good point.  We shall see!